Celebrating Imperfections

April 25, 2008 at 10:07 pm Leave a comment

I love to read the Back in Skinny Jeans blog. Steph tackles tough issues as well providing handy diet-and-exercise tips and poking fun at the kookier side of our looks-obsessed culture. In short, there is always something interesting and frequently thought provoking to read at Back in Skinny Jeans.

I was particularly impressed by her post about “The Leather Jacket Metaphor“. In it, Steph discusses how for years she avoided relationships because she felt she was too flawed to be loved. She then relates how someone once shared The Leather Jacket Metaphor with her.

“But put simply, some guy told me this metaphor years ago about flaws. He said that people love old leather jackets because over time the jacket becomes more interesting and full of character after years of the leather being beaten up, abused, and weathered. The jacket feels more real and soft over time. Who wants a brand new, shiny, stiff, leather jacket? The imperfections is what makes the distressed version more desirable.”

Lord knows, many of us have probably worried we’re too scarred – literally and figuratively – to warrant a healthy, loving relationship. This isn’t a new issue. But, somehow, this metaphor – which I’d never heard before – captures the essence of what we need to know about ourselves. Our quirks and idiosyncrasies, along with our ability to overcome challenging, sometimes horrendous, circumstances, make us the intriguingly complex creatures we are. They give us depth. They demonstrate our resilience. This makes us attractive to others because it shows that we’re able to appreciate and support a partner who’s been scarred in his or her own way.

I will remember this metaphor. It’s a great way to see myself.


Entry filed under: coping strategies, self image. Tags: .

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